Of mad dogs and Englishman…

Simon & Lisa Thomas

Lets face it, most motorcyclists are adventurers and avid explorers, and most of us only dream about taking on that big “round the world” trip someday. It unfortunately stays a dream for most of us, what with the pressing responsibilities of life. But now and again we come across someone who has done it, or somebody who is in the process of doing it. These characters at first seem a little looney, in that very laid-back relaxed kind of way in which they go about their business. They almost never race, almost always travel slowly, and almost never fret about where they will sleep that night, and are seemingly unfazed about the pressures us mere mortals suffer from everyday. It is then no surprise that most overland motorcycle trips and epic journeys to far away destinations through jungles and deserts, up to now, have been undertaken on BMW motorcycles. With the advent of the first of their GS type dual motorcycles, BMW started the culture of using big boxer-engined machines to quickly nip down to Uganda or from Cape to Cairo, preferably in record time to not miss out on afternoon tea!

These machines have become the preferred mode of travel, and most overland motorcycle records are set on BMW’s. I do not know if it has something to do with the dreary English weather, or the fact that these ex-colonisers fancy themselves as big explorers, but quite a few “round the world” and overland trips through Africa have been done by Englishman. Ted Simon was so happy to be rid of the Queen’s rule that he quickly rode around the world twice! Another looney Englishman who is currently busy doing it is Simon Thomas, but Simon is not alone: His wife Lisa is equally looney. They travel together on their own BMW’s. Now this is one very not-so-looney Englishman!

In May 2003 Simon and wife Lisa Thomas left the UK on “Tinkerbell” (1999 BMW R 1100 GS), and Tarzan (Lisa’s highly modified F 650 GS), with a dream that would make many so-called sane people shake their heads. In the stakes for deciding who is the worlds biggest looney, these two would definitely be in the top rankings. Simon, who was once the MD of a big British Telecom company, and Lisa, a late starter in the IT industry, met each other in 1991, and married in 1994. This was obviously a match made in heaven, as they both share a passion for motorcycles. But everything was not all easy, with Simon suffering from a terrible motorcycle accident in 1999, that left him virtually paralysed for nearly twelve months. What followed was an agonizing ordeal of reconstructive surgery, painful physiotherapy, and listening to doctors speculating that he would always walk with a limp. On the bright side, this time gave him the opportunity to reflect on what life is all about, and you can say that this was the start of all this looney business. Obviously he and Lisa were talking increasingly about doing the big trip, and one day they just decided to sell everything, pack the bikes, and be off. Now for many people this whole story up to here would be more than impressive, because it can end in the sort of style of… “So they rode right around the world, got bitten by mosquitoes, ran out of fuel a couple of times, were imprisoned in Borneo etc., were welcomed back in the UK like heroes, and now both live in Dorset where they teach stressed city executives the art of relaxing and flower arranging!” No boy, their story is very different.

Top Right: Travelling through Spain. Left: Norway Right: Lisa on the 650 riding in Uganda

Before leaving the UK on their epic journey, Simon’s mother was diagnosed with Cancer. A year earlier Lisa’s father had to undergo a quadruple heart bypass, whilst she herself suffers from cardiac complications. For obvious reasons the two then decided to, at the same time, try and raise money for the British Heart Foundation, and the British Charity “CancerBACUP”. Lisa through her work as an IT specialist within the water industry also worked closely with the aid organization WaterAid. The organization does valuable work in most of the countries they were to travel through, so it made perfect sense to support these three charities on their trip, as all of them represented something special for them. So that is all good and well, and you could be forgiven for getting a bit teary-eyed about these nice people doing all these nice things for a lot of other nice people, whilst having the time of their life. The next step of their planning they definitely went even a bit more looney; so looney that even their friends started worrying about their sanity. To go on a trip around the world is fine, but to do it the way in which they had planned it, was seen as pretty crazy. Not just quickly down Africa from North to South, ship the bikes to South America, visit the states, and then zip through the bottom part of southern Asia. Not so easy, as if that’s easy. Simon and Lisa decided that they would at the same time try to set not one but three world records! The first being the furthest distance travelled by a team on a motorbike, the second being the most number of countries ridden by a female motorcyclist, and lastly the oldest female to have circumnavigated the globe. To succeed they needed to have completed the journey having visited 122 countries. What made their journey even more overwhelming is the fact that they were to do it un-assisted, with no help from big sponsorship, or back-up vehicles. When all was done, they started with a quick stint through Wales, Ireland, and Scotland. From there it was off to Norway to visit Hammerfest, the most northerly town in the world. And why not? This proved to be a serious revelation for the pair, as all of a sudden whilst riding in sub-zero temperatures the true reality of life on the road hit home. From here they travelled through Russia, where they were interrogated by a crazy policeman, who eventually let them off after they promised to put a photograph of him on their website! Next they travelled through the Baltic countries and enjoyed the charms and sophistication of the cultural city of Budapest, fell a few times in the mountains of Slovakia, and witnessed the shock of what has become a visit to Auschwitz concentration camp in Poland. In Austria Simon spent 14 hours replacing the clutch on the 1100 GS. From there it was of to Southern Spain, from where they embarked for the African continent and Morocco. This proved to be another major eye-opener in terms of the road conditions, and to top it all Simon’s GS dropped a drive shaft in the south-east of the country, just as they were getting ready for Mauritania. The small town of Merzouga became their home for a few weeks whilst they waited for the right parts to arrive to repair the broken drive shaft. From there it was a curious combination of the nightmare of dodging minefields and having fun in the desert. They eventually arrived in South Africa at the beginning of 2005, having already covered over 70 000 km’s, and ridden through more than 36 countries. From South Africa they shipped the bikes to South America for the next leg of their adventure. Whilst in South Africa they held various presentations at some of the BMW motorcycle clubs, and at a few of the Cape storm stores around the country. They also attended the 2005 BMW Annual Gathering in Oudtshoorn, where their interesting and sometimes hilarious account of their travels had guests in stitches. Since they do this trip without assistance and very little sponsorship, they rely on printing calendars and other memorabilia from their trip, which they sell to supplement their fuel bill.

Simon ’s trusted 1999 BMW R 1100 GS was modified with Ohlins suspension, a 42 litre tank, Touratech aluminium luggage boxes, Scorch Rally Exhaust system, 60 mm handlebar risers, Touratech dual headlights and loads of other goodies.

The bikes

For Lisa they bought a BMW F 650 GS, fitted dual Touratech 39 litre fuel tanks, Touratech Aluminium boxes, right side exhaust and security box conversion, Sebring Rally exhaust, 30 mm handlebar risers, two 12-volt power outlets, and various other modifications. Another important modification was to replace the battery with a BMW Gel type, sealed unit. A little pricey, but they do not leak when the bike is lying on its side, spilling acid all over the rider when picking up the bike. They also do not need to be removed when shipping the bike or storing it for extended periods.

As you read this Simon & Lisa is somewhere in Japan. In South America Simon had a serious accident and was hospitalised again, but this mad dog definitely has some feline blood in his veins.

Lisa sometimes battles with her health, but

seems to cope well. Their record-breaking attempt is starting to look like a real possibility.

Check out their website, and hopefully we will even see a book at the end of their trip,  as their trip recordings and photographs are brilliant. It should be a good one.

All Pic’s © Simon & Lisa Thomas 2006

How to travel lighter

If you have too much packing space, you will end

up taking too much stuff. If you have more than

a tank bag, panniers or boxes and a roll bag, rethink.

• Make sure everything you take with has more

than one use. A groundsheet doubles up as a tarpaulin, or a hammock. A Frisbee can be a plate, or even hold loose spares when fixing your bike. But why take a Frisbee anyway?

• Use compression sacks for packing your clothes.

• Have one change of clothes, so that you can wear one and wash the other. If space permits take a fancy shirt and pants for when the occasion demands it.

• Try to make sure that all your battery-operated

gadgets such as GPS, shavers, and electronic

equipment use the same type of batteries.

What they recommend in terms of clothing

BMW Rally Suits – They feel that these are better than conventional leather suits, as they are better ventilated, have more vents and zips to open when riding in hot weather. The built-in and removable Gore-Tex inner liners also offer superior protection in the cold and in wet

weather. I have seen their BMW suits when they arrived in South Africa, after nearly 70 000 km’s,

and there was still plenty of life left in them.

• Motocross Boots – When it is wet

try to wear waterproof socks underneath.

These boots take a little time wearing in, but they are a lifesaver when it comes to protecting

ankles and prevent injury.

• BMW System’s  Helmet – They recommend these, as the flip front saves you many hassles when you need to identify yourself at border posts, and police checkpoints. The helmet can also be converted into a Motocross type helmet, worn with goggles.

• Heated vest and heated grips – At first they thought these are for sissies, but at sub-zero temperatures these can be a lifesaver

Left: Camping somewhere in Africa Right: Lake Malawi

To find out more about their travels, visit their website www.2ridetheworld.com